Leyla’s Plight

Leyla’s Plight

N.B. This story is not really mine, but more one that I adapted some years ago. The original was called ‘What I Had Always Wanted’ by Mark. Basically, I rewrote it from a standard US setting to a Saudi one with veils, with the initial idea of posting it on Tales of the Veils before deciding it perhaps wasn’t best suited there. Not my best work, it nonetheless deserves to be made public for those who like TG stories.

Dave

Chapter 1         

Ever since I can remember I have been fascinated by women’s clothing. Well, at least, the clothes that you can see which here in Saudi Arabia is not very much, only the outer layer, all-encompassing black abayahs, black headscarves and black face-veils. Probably it’s because I am a man and straight that when I see those mysterious veiled figures walking up and down the streets that I feel excited by them and want more, and since I can only see the veils, then it is the veils that capture my imagination. Yes, it’s because I’m straight that I did what I did that day, not because I’m gay. In my mind gays are evil, against the Law of Allah and should be stoned. I have never been gay, which in some ways makes it all harder.

That day I was alone in the house. My father had gone out and my mother and three sisters, (two older, one younger), had gone to the shopping mall. When I was sure that I would be alone for a long time, I went into the room of Saffira, my eldest and most elegant sister, and started getting out her clothes. Of course I didn’t want anyone to catch me; my sisters would never stop making fun of me and dad would have a fit, but I knew that they’d be away for hours and if they found any clothes out of place I could blame it all on Naima, my youngest sister, who I blamed for everything and she would get the beating.

So, I went into her walk-in wardrobe and picked out a beautiful embroidered abayah which I fitted over my head. Then came a pair of finely-tailored opera gloves in black satin and high-heeled shoes for my feet. Then a headscarf and finally a veil, fitted over my face and tied at the back. My family aren’t strict but sometimes occasion demands extra modesty and this was my sister’s most serious veil with three layers that could be flipped down inidividually. The first was thick but left the eyes free, the second thinner but covered the eyes in a fine gauze and the third thick and almost blinding. Walking around with just the first down was strange; my breath warmed my face up quickly. Then I flipped down the second. It was weird, everything seen in a haze. Then, excited, I flipped down the third. I could only make out the dimmest of outlines and felt enclosed, covered and controlled. I also felt alone in my cocoon and sat down on a chair to daydream about how it must be to wear such clothing every time you leave the house as some religious girls do. Unfortunately, I was so lost in my reveries that I only heard the key turning in the lock when it was too late.

I later learnt that they had come back early because mum had forgotten her credit card.


Chapter 2

When mum opened the door all she saw was a strange woman sat on her sofa. She said hello and I froze. I have never been so terrified in my life. Then she figured out who it really was and went crazy. My sisters had joined her by this time and their reaction was a mixture of anger and laughter. I was just humiliated. Mum said I was disgusting and continued pleading to Allah as to why He had sent her a son who was gay and wanted to be a girl. I tried to tell her that I wasn’t gay and I had just always wondered what it felt like to be veiled. She wouldn’t listen though and told me that I was really in trouble and that my dad would kill me. Immediately I realised dad would be back home soon and I begged my mother to allow me to change back into my male clothes but she refused saying that he should see me in all my shame. I had to sit in the kitchen in dread for three hours and wait for my father, all the while begging her to let me change.

Finally my father arrived. He flipped out too. He gave me ten strikes with the cane and made me promise never ever to wear girls’ clothes again. My mother wasn’t satisfied though. She said that she didn’t believe my promise and she suspected that I would merely go back to  what she called my ‘habit’ but would just be more careful. She had a different punishment in mind. Since I loved dressing up like a girl so much, she would see to it that I got a chance to dress up often. In fact, she said, I would dress up so often that I would become sick of it and would never want to touch women’s clothing again. My father was reluctant, but eventually agreed that a drastic solution was required.

Mortified, I listened as my sentence was passed. I was to dress up like a girl all the time for three months. I nearly fainted. My sisters all thought it was hilarious. Naima said that it was Allah’s judgement after all the times I had had her punished for deeds that weren’t hers. Dad said that to save shame and embarrassment, he would tell everybody that Abdul had left to stay with an uncle and that our cousin from Asir Province was staying with us in return. From now on the family would refer to me as Leyla instead of Abdul.

Saffira laughed at this. She said that since I was supposed to be from Asir Province which is very conservative and since I had voluntarily chosen her most severe outfit, then it was obviously my wish to be dressed as an extremely pious musilmah for the next three months. All my sisters and my mother agreed with this and said that the life of pious Leyla would start the next day.

The next day I woke up. Saffira showed me how to shave all the hair off my body including that around my genitals which was most humiliating. Then she and Saeeda, my middle sister, placed a steel sheathe over my penis. Pushing my testicles back into my body she pulled the two chains through my legs, pulling my penis securely between my legs. She then pulled the chains through my arse crack and around my waist, closing them with a small lock. I would now have to sit in order to urinate. There would be no more telling bulge in front of my panties. Instead it looked like all I had was a girl’s empty cavity. Worse of all, I would not be able to have an erection. In fact, having an erection would be painful. They locked this chastity belt and gave the key to mum. When I protested they said that wearing a chastity belt fitted in with my religious image as I would be around non-mahram men here in Riyadh. Mum also said it would help me to become more feminine as I would have to sit down to pee. They then dressed me in panties, a bra, pantyhose, an undershirt, an abayah, headscarf and veil. When I protested that veils were only for outdoors they said that women in Asir Province wear them indoors as well. Even dressed in all that though, they weren’t happy. They said that my eyebrows looked too male so Naima sat me down and plucked them into two rounded arches. She then showed me how to do my makeup and fix my hair.

I was horrified when my mother told me that we were going to the mall. Desperately I begged her not to humiliate me publicly. I only liked dressing up privately. I didn’t hurt anyone, why was I being punished? My father explained that I was doing something unnatural and that this would show me my place. He watched sternly as my mother and sisters helplessly dragged me to the car. My mother explained that since I would be completely covered, I would not be embarrassed. People would just think I was a regular teenage girl. Which is what I had wanted anyhow, she told me.

We went of to the mall. First we went to buy clothes for me. My mother bought a whole new wardrobe for me. I could have died as we walked into all these women’s clothing stores and mom and Saffira told the pretty sales girls ALL about me, my punishment and why I was being punished. They all laughed at me and were very enthusiastic about dressing me up.

Then we went to a hair salon and got extensions put in my hair so that I now had a wavy ebony mane that reached to my middle back. Great, how would I explain that to the guys at school when I was allowed to become Abdul again? Then we got my ears pierced. The process didn’t last long but it did sting. Soon I had three studs in each ear. That was another thing I would have to explain at school.

Finally we went to eat. It was really difficult trying to eat as a girl, pushing my food under a veil so as not to reveal any skin. Many women seemed to easily see through my disguise and I drew many stares. I also drew many stares of a different nature from the men. I hated those.

When we got home my mother and sisters spent hours making me practice walking and talking as a girl. As I angrily complained they asked me if when I went out in public, which would be often, I would like everyone to know my real gender. That made me shut up as I quickly became more adept at acting feminine. When they were done I went down to where dad was. He made me strut around for him. He sneeringly remarked that I was really hot and would make a good lay. It was obvious that he no longer respected me anymore. I also found that dad had locked away all my boy’s clothes. I would only get those for school. My closets were now filled with dresses, skirts and lingerie while I had several pairs of heels. In desperation I cried out, “Allah, please let these three months pass quickly!” At this my sisters sniggered and mum said that it might be more than three months. I didn’t understand what she meant and asked her to explain.

She answered me. “You’re manhood is now on trial. When you prove to me that you are really a man then I’ll believe that you have overcome your perverted habit. If you do not prove your manhood then something else will be done. We’re doing this for your own good. We will not allow you to be a perverted faggot and freak for the rest of your life. You are either a man or a woman. Now we’ll find out which one you are.” She did not say anything more. So began my new life.


Chapter 3

My life changed completely. There was no more school and instead I had to stay at home and help with the chores. My sisters would often have me run errands or take me out in public. It was absolutely humiliating. Especially when old neighbours and acquaintances recognised me. At home all the housework was given to me. I virtually became a maid. My social life died, as I no longer would hang out with my friends. Worse though was the death of my sex life. That was really frustrating. As I said before, I’m not gay and I love girls. I’ve met with quite a few and I have the usual sex drive of a healthy teenage male. Strangely wearing those clothes excited me even more and treated as a woman, I got to see lots of my sister’s hot friends unveiled, but wearing that chastity belt I couldn’t even masturbate. It drove me nuts.

My mother and sisters taught how to raise my voice by one octave and to speak with a girlish lisp. Whenever I was at home I had to talk like a girl. However, they all agreed that my speech as a female was not entirely convincing and so to save embarrassment and to fit in with my new religious image, I would have to wear a gag whenever I left the house. Saffira and Saeeda took me to the mall again and selected a really large inflatable one that hurt my mouth when it was in and inflated but certainly blocked out any sound.

Now I no longer went out. Except when my sisters took me to their friends’ houses where I was humiliated by girls my own age or to shopping malls. Always I was gagged and veiled and after a couple of weeks they started putting handcuffs and shackles on me saying that religious girls sometimes wore them to give them shorter steps and to protect their modesty. I was like a toy that my sisters wheeled out to play with for their own pleasure. After all the years I bullied them and blamed them for things I suppose they were getting their revenge. I didn’t realise until then how much all the women in the house actually hated the spoilt only son. But by then it was too late to change it.

Another thing I found is that women’s clothing is very uncomfortable. It was one thing to wear them now and again around the house, it’s another story to dress up for a long time. High heels made my feet ache. The pantyhose itched and they were too hot. The bra really irritated my chest and I could never get used to the falsies that I had to wear so that it looked like I had breasts. Worst though were the veils. I had to get used to walking outside half-blinded, all the time black material sticking to my nose as I overheated inside my female attire.

Changes around the house continued. Slowly my room was redecorated. My old blue bedspread and drapes were removed. So were my posters of athletes and half-naked models. In their place came pink sheets and drapes. I got new pink wallpaper. Posters of ballerinas and cats were put up on my wall. So was a poster of a famous male singer, a gift from Saeeda. Thanks a lot sis! Female vocalists and male pop groups that all the girls gushed over replaced my alternative and hard rock CD’s. I was getting everything a normal teenage girl could ever want. Except that I was not a normal teenage girl. Photographs of “Abdul” were removed and replaced by photographs of “Leyla.”

After a few months everyone got used to having me around dressed like a girl. Indeed, if you had not known me from before you would think that I was a perfectly natural female. My dad, who had snubbed me for a month, soon seemed to warm to his new daughter. He always called me Leyla and treated me as if I had always been a girl. Mum in the meantime was a harsh taskmaster who made sure I stayed in character.

Then my birthday came. All I got as a present was more girl’s clothes, jewellery and lingerie, which was annoying. I figured that at least when this punishment was over I’d have lots of presents to give my future girlfriends.

As another month passed I began to hear rumours through Saeeda that mum and dad were beginning to think that it was time to see if I deserved a reprieve. This made me happy.

On the last day of the month I was called into the living room for a family meeting. As usual, I was dressed like a girl. On the table were a bottle of glue and a box of tampons

“Leyla,” began my mother, “this is a family meeting to decide your future concerning this punishment. We must decide for your own good whether you will now go back to being a man or whether we will move on to the punishment’s second stage. You will have no say in this. I don’t believe that you are in a position to judge clearly. After all, you’ll probably be concerned with all sorts of trivial nonsensical things like what your friends will think. That can be taken care of. For your own good we must decided whether you are really male or female deep down inside. Trust me, you don’t want the real you stuck in a closet until it emerges under tragic circumstances. If changes must be made, they should be made while you are still young, before you get married and have a family. We as impartial observers will judge.” Normally I would have bellowed I should decide for myself but I was by now used to demurely doing what I was told. And besides, Saffira had made sure that I was firmly gagged at the time.

My father spoke first. “I think we should end this punishment. I don’t think Abdul will ever want to touch women’s clothing again. He has constantly shown that he does not enjoy wearing women’s clothes and finds them uncomfortable. He’s definitely a man.”

Mum did not agree. “Look how well those clothes fit. How he talks and walks like a girl. These feminine tendencies of his are very deep. Look how he now sits quietly while we decide his fate. If he were really a man he would be yelling his head off. Outside no one can distinguish him from a woman. He’s very attractive and draws the attention of all the men. Abdul is obviously meant to be a young attractive young lady whether he wants to admit it or not. Whatever he may say because of society’s influence. This is obvious to any impartial person who can observe him now. Why, during the past few months he has even stopped complaining about dressing like that. He may as well have been dressing like this all his life, which he actually has been doing in secret before I caught him. Acting like a girl is second nature to him. He needs more time as a girl so that we can see better.”

My father argued back. “He is so good at acting like a girl because he has been dressing like one for eight months and for quite some time in secret. He hasn’t been complaining because he has gotten used to it and now sees that whining won’t get him anywhere.”

“You’ve just proven my point. You admit that he has been dressing up like a girl for a long time. And you’ve noted how he has gotten used to acting like a girl. Tell me, would any real man get used to dressing like a girl ever? You just say he’s a boy because admitting he’s a girl makes you insecure about your masculinity.”

Deadlock. My parents turned to my sisters. They were obviously just there to give advice and contribute their opinions. Normally nothing they would say would decide anything; this was my parent’s decision. But now that they were at an impasse they asked Saffira, Saeeda and Naima what they thought. I was overjoyed. They would surely tell mum that I should go back to being a boy. Instead they got me back for all the years when I made their lives hell.

Saffira, being the eldest, spoke first: “I agree with mum. Not only that, but Abdul has told me in confidence that he will continue dressing like a girl in private and that he is happy that this punishment gave him so much experience.” Then Saeeda and Naima added, “Not only that, he told us that he likes the attention he gets from men and will remember to experiment with them in the future.” That decided it. Dad looked disappointed. He got up and left the room. Mum ordered me to strip. I told her emphatically that they were lying but she didn’t believe me.

Once all my clothes were off Saffira took some glue and stuck my falsies to my chest. Mum said that she had the solution that would negate the glue and that she would only apply it when she thought I could be a man again. My falsies would only be taken off for a short period of time so I could wash my chest or when I no longer needed them.

As a final step my mother picked up the box of tampons. She announced that from this time on this week of the month would be my period. During the week of my so-called period I was expected to put a tampon up my arse! I looked at her in shock. “Why Leyla,” she cut in, “being a girl isn’t all fun and games. You have to experience the hardships of being a girl too.” She then asked me to bend over while she ceremoniously shoved my first tampon up my arsehole. Talk about uncomfortable and humiliating.

After that awful evening things went from bad to worse. My mother got a prescription for female hormones and would only give me food to eat if I took one of the pink estrogen pills. My skin began to get soft. I began to get thinner everywhere except for my hips which began to swell. Worse yet, when I got my falsies taken off so I could wash my chest, I noticed that I had begun to grow breasts. My mother religiously measured my chest to check my progress.

I was still trying to convince mum that I was not meant to be a girl. I pointed out that I liked girls, not boys. My mother retorted that I would never know whether I liked boys or not because I had never had any sexual experience with boys. This gave Saffira an idea. She and Saeeda took me to a place where boys and girls meet secretly away from the eyes of the religious police. When I was Abdul I’d gone there quite a few times to meet girls. Having a sexual relationship outside of marriage is illegal here in Saudi but that doesn’t mean to say that it can’t be done. I used to love going there, seeing a beautiful pair of female eyes peeping out from behind some veils, and then taking her back to the car for a little illegal fun. This time though, I wasn’t looking forward to it at all. This time it was me who was veiled and it was the boys who wanted me now, not the girls.

Saffira found me a boyfriend and we went to his car. He was skinny and not a good-looking man at all. He was really horny though and jumped at the opportunity to go out with the attractive hot young teen he thought I was. He was a real prick. During the first three dates it was all I could do to keep him from ripping off my clothes and discovering that I was really a boy. This was crazy, my family could not making me act like a homosexual.

At fist I started making plans to run away and go to the police to complain about child abuse. But then I realised that this would mean total public humiliation for myself and my family, so I decided that it would be better to bide my time. Goodness only knew what people would think if they found out I had been forced to live like a girl for five months. Not to mention what they would think when they found out that I had originally enjoyed putting on girl’s clothing. I could afford to bide my time. Nothing that had been done to me up until now was permanent, right?

I still felt sure that my family would eventually come to its senses and this madness would stop without total embarrassment. Eventually dad would make mum stop. Or eventually my sisters would stop being angry at me and would tell my parents that they had lied when they had said I would continue acting girlishly once the punishment was over. As for my mum, I knew that she had decided that I must really be a girl at heart. My mother was quite strict about sex roles, even more than my father. I always felt that she did not know how to relate to me as her son. Now she got to relate to me as her daughter and got to dress me up however she wanted. I got to be every mother’s dream, a daughter who acted like her mother’s personal barbie doll. She would curl my hair, help me put on make-up and buy me earrings. Everyday in the morning my face was plastered with foundation, my eyebrows trimmed and thick pink lip gloss put on my lips which made them look like they were pouting for a man.

When I complained to Saffira that I could not hold off Hussain’s (my boyfriend) advances anymore, she told me to suck his cock. That way I could satisfy him without removing my clothes. I was a girl now so it was something I was supposed to love. I felt disgusted. But one night as I was alone with Hussain in his car he went berserk He lifted up my skirt and was ready to rip off my panties and panty hose. He was virtually threatening to rape me. Desperately I went down on my knees and opened his zipper. Taking his cock out, I kissed it and took it into my mouth. Using my tongue and pink glossy lips I made him hard. As his dick grew I nearly gagged. I felt like throwing up as it was. Finally he came in my mouth and I had to swallow his salty white cum. I felt like throwing up.

From then on Saffira made sure that I satisfied Hussain adequately. According to him, I was an amazing cocksucker. Saffira asked me for my method, although she told me that she hated oral sex but thought it was worth while to know anyway. She thought oral sex and cock sucking was kind of kinky. It was something kinky girls like me, her depraved cousin, did.

While Hussain was having a grand time I was getting more and more frustrated. I could not have an erection, let alone cum. Just looking at a girl caused my penis to strain against the sheathe, causing me excruciating pain. It drove me nuts that a wimp like Hussain was being granted continuous sexual gratification while someone like me couldn’t even bear to look at a woman anymore because this would cause my penis to begin swelling. I had to train myself to stop thinking about hot women and to stop staring at hot women, which was probably exactly what mum wanted. All my pathetic attempts to break the sheath’s lock failed.

In the meantime I was being forced to play the role of a girl with Hussain it was becoming too much to bear. The hormone pills were making my body more and more girlish. My mother monitored how much I was eating and forced me to eat only small amounts of food in order to ” keep my figure. ” This made me hungry all the time. On top of all this I was still expected to do the cooking and housework.

All my pleading for this process to stop fell on deaf ears. I told mum angrily that a psychologist, not her, should decide whether I was male or female. To my surprise, she agreed and told me that she had already contacted some doctors who would deal with my case. I was happy, now they would explain that I had only been going through a stage and that my habit was a small thing. They would make mum treat me like a boy. Mum and my sisters though, had other things in mind.

Mum had indeed contacted some doctors. She had called Dr. Tariq Abbas, a Pakistani plastic surgeon just out of med-school who wanted to open his own private practice and greatly appreciated ANY job he could find. He also appreciated the large amount of money my parents, who were not poor at all, threw at him. She had also called Dr. Mohammed Atta, a veteran psychologist who was extremely fascinated with my case. He was a sexologist who eagerly wanted to examine a case of a boy being turned into a girl. How this would affect him/her. He was also quite impressed with the money my parents gave him.

So it was that one day I was taken to the hospital for a check up. I was rather nervous when the doctor, Dr. Abbas, checked my identification. My I.D. listed me as male, but Dr..Abbas didn’t seem to mind. He injected me with what she told me was a vaccine. It was really anaesthetic. As I began to get drowsy and dose off, the last thing I remember seeing was a blurry picture of Dr. Abbas looking down at me with sympathy and muttering to himself, “It’s amazing in the end what I’ll do for money.”

When I woke up some time later, something felt different. My chest. I had breasts! Dr. Abbas had given me implants. They weren’t obscenely big but they were large enough to make most girls of my age envious. I was stunned. This could not be happening. I wanted to make a scene, I should have made a scene, but I was too stunned. My mother took me home. I merely sat in the car quietly, staring out the window. How could they do this to me? This was no longer some sort of joke. This was real. I suddenly realised that maybe my optimism had been misguided. Maybe dad had come to terms with my alleged girlishness. I noticed that ever since that day when my sisters had convinced mum and dad to make me continue living as a girl he had not been acting the same way towards me. He was more gentle, condescending even. My sisters were still pissed off at me. I began to feel trapped. In the meantime my mother explained that she had been told that hormones would at most make me a B-cup so she decided to go for implants to make my breasts bigger. All the while I felt the new sensation of having breasts, this was all too strange.

When we got home I ran to my room and stayed there. I only came out to fix dinner and then left without eating anything. Not that mum let me eat much anyway. This was permanent. This showed me that this was no longer some messed up punishment meant to exhaust any girlish tendencies. My parent’s believed that I wanted to be a girl deep down inside. What made things worse was that everyone acted as though nothing was wrong. As if it was perfectly normal for me to have breasts.

The next day I was alone with dad. He asked me if everything was okay and how the breasts felt. I told him that I didn’t want to have breasts. I demanded to be taken to a psychologist. My dad agreed and I was taken to Dr. Atta.

Hussain, of course, was thrilled with the change. Up until now. I had only let him touch my breasts through my shirt. If they were under my shirt, my falsies could pass for real breasts. Now of course, I didn’t need falsies to fill my bra since I had breasts. This meant I could go topless in front of Hussain and let him play with my breasts all he wanted. That was the one advantage about getting implants. It really did feel good when someone played with them. If they hadn’t been associated with so much humiliation, I may have actually enjoyed them.

I continued meeting with Dr. Atta. I told him that I did not want to become a girl. That I only had a tiny curiosity about girl’s clothing. That I was totally heterosexual and utterly loved my penis and wanted without any doubt to be a man. Dr. Atta was very polite and listened to me. Then he went to write his report. He said that I had a deep subliminal desire to be a woman. That I would be happier in the long run as a woman. That the only reason why I claimed to want to be a man was because I was afraid of what my friends might think. That despite my verbal claims that I wanted to be a man, my actions clearly indicated that I was a woman deep down inside. I fit perfectly into the feminine role. I totally looked, talked and walked like a girl. He said I was enjoying a healthy relationship with Hussain and that I excelled as the girl in a relationship, making a subtle reference to my cock sucking abilities. Finally, he wrote that I was overjoyed to have breasts and that I loved playing with them. This was followed up by mum’s testimony. She had caught me playing with my breasts on more than one occasion. I mean, what else did they expect me to do with my dick tied up as it was, a guy had to find relief somehow.

Of course Naima, who never seemed to mature and didn’t seem to understand that this was my life she was playing with, remembered to throw in enough imaginary stories about me telling her how desperately I wanted to be a girl and how I was totally crazy about Hussain. She was still pissed off about all the tales I’d told about her when I was Abdul so she was getting me back. My parents of course believed everything she said and this seemed to strengthen my mother’s resolve to feminise me and my father no longer tried to restrain her.

So it was that my family with the help of Dr. Atta and some more money thrown in on the side got my birth certificate changed. I was no longer listed as a boy named Abdul but as a girl named Leyla. All my ID was changed. I was not informed of this and I would only find out at the end of the summer.

When they did tell me though, I just looked down at my now heaving breasts and cried. My dad told me not to worry and to be brave, they had taken care of everything and soon my ordeal would be over and he felt sure that I would be much happier. I hugged my dad. Ever since I had got my breasts he was always being very nice to me. Just that he kept treating me as if I was his daughter, “daddy’s little girl.” I just would have preferred to play football with him or any of the other things fathers normally did with their sons. No matter how many times I asked him if he wanted to kick a football around with me or even wrestle like we used to, he’d politely and quietly refuse. He just wasn’t interested in doing those things with me anymore; they weren’t fitting activities for a growing girl to engage in. And when he said ‘growing’ he’d point at my chest which only emphasised my situation.


Chapter 4

I realised that if I wanted to put a stop to all this, it would not be done through the police, it would have to be done through my psychotherapist, Dr. Atta. As of yet I still hadn’t realised that Dr. Atta was actually supporting my continued feminisation. I thought he was just being misled by my mother and my sisters. He actually was ecstatic about reviewing my case and was eagerly keeping track of my physical, mental and societal changes. Later on he would write an excellent scientific report on my case that would earn him quite a bit of recognition. However, I just decided that next time I saw him I would have to demand an outright cessation of what my family was calling my reassignment.

Others were hostile and some, particularly Naima’s friends, were downright violent. When I was taken to their houses for coffee, I was kept gagged and restrained whilst they enjoyed pinching my breasts and feeling the implants. All I could do was try to ignore their taunting or curl up into a ball when they might try to hit me.

Many more people such as mum’s friends who I had known since childhood were just plain curious. These were also annoying. They asked all these embarrassing questions about why I wanted to be a girl and how it felt to have breasts and hips and so on. This obsession with my budding girlishness bugged me. I just wanted things to be as they always had been. I might look like a girl but I was still the same Abdul, right?

My mum made me drop all my studies and instead said I must concentrate on feminine pursuits. I was also enrolled in a belly-dancing class and I soon became an excellent belly-dancer. I also regularly did aerobics at a local female gym and in my room at home. My mum made sure I got plenty of exercise.

The only advantage out of all this was that before and after gym class I was able to get a good look at the girls changing in the locker room.

At home I still had to do all the housework, mum kept making sure I was acting feminine, continually criticising everything I did. Dad just treated me like a ditzy teeny bopper. My sisters still frequently made fun of me. I got no relief anywhere.

Worse of all though, Saffira found me a new boyfriend. This guy was not like Hussain at all. He was 19 years old (I had turned seventeen recently) and he was really big. Hussain had been my age and was just a horny little wimp who had been lucky enough to go out with me. This guy was a muscle bound jock who could have any girl he wanted and he wanted to go out with me. This just drove home to me that I really was turning into a girl. Not just a pretty girl, but a knockout. I had incredible breasts. Between the hormones I was taking, the aerobics, and the starvation diet mum had me on, I had an amazing body. I often got an erection just by looking at myself in the mirror while I dressed, that was really weird. I was really hot and now I had a really sexy man to go out with. Thanks a lot Saffira.

As for Hussain, he’d moved to Doha but we still kept in touch. We mailed mushy sappy love notes to each other. At my Saffira’s suggestion Saeeda took several revealing photographs of me posing in lingerie and sent them to him. Hussain was overjoyed and wrote to me that he had hung them on his wall and would stare at them for hours, pining away for me. Yeah right. Under all of this I was still a guy and I knew what he was doing. He probably used those pictures when he masturbated. Just what I had always wanted, to be the object of a guy’s sex fantasy.

Zaheer (my new boyfriend) was really impulsive, just like Hussain. Unfortunately, while I was able to fight off the smaller Hussain whenever he became too aggressive, I was powerless to hold off Zaheer. To begin with, Zaheer was satisfied to feel me off and to have me suck his cock. I really hated sucking cock, the thought of swallowing cum just repels me. I just don’t understand those girls who do. My girlfriend (before all this started) was quite a cock sucker. She loved cum. The taste and smell of it drove her nuts. Of course, not all girls were like this. I knew that Saffira hated sucking cock. But she thought it was alright if her little cousin did it. Zaheer was really hard to suck. His dick was much bigger then Hussain’s and it filled my mouth even before it even got hard. I nearly choked on it when it started growing, filling my mouth and moving into my throat pinning my tongue to the bottom of my mouth. Under those conditions I had to strain my cock sucking abilities to make him cum. But cum he did. He said that I was the best cock sucker he had ever dated.

But I could only hold him off for so long and eventually he got so lustful he just ripped off my abayah and underclothes, finding my chastity belt. I was terrified. After staring at it for five minutes he nodded and said that he understood since even if I was a whore at heart, I came from a religious family and so they must have seen through my modest façade to my depraved nature and made me take precautions Despite normal sex being an impossibility I was still one of the hottest dates he had ever had and he thought that dating me would be a real interesting experience. So we continued seeing each other.

Zaheer still wasn’t satisifed with cock sucking and soon introduced me to what he liked to call the subtle pleasures of anal sex. Yeah right! I have never felt more pain then when he shoved his massive thick cock up my arse again and again for the first time. I just started crying because of the pain and begged him to stop. All I could hear were his ecstatic shouts, at least he was enjoying himself. Finally, I was relieved by the feeling of his penis firing cum into my arse. Sometimes, when he wasn’t in too much of a rush he would remember to lubricate my arse before plunging his dick into it. Thank goodness for small mercies, eh? After getting reamed up the arse I usually couldn’t walk normally all day. If it was done without lubricant, which happened often enough, every step I took was painful and my arse ached liked crazy.

In the meantime, I was wondering where my parents were going with all this. They had told me that they were doing all this so that I would not be some sort of half female and half male freak. So they could decide whether I should be a woman or a man. I would not be some sort of freak. I could not be both. Yet here I had become some sort of female male. A sickening she-male creature. I looked like a red hot babe but I still had male genitals and I wanted to be a boy.

No, I was a boy and they couldn’t change that. Even as I stared at my reflection in the mirror I could feel the irony of those words. All my male musculature had disintegrated. One look at my breasts and my hips told me I was fighting a losing battle. I could only stare at the reflection of the hot blonde with a penis and repeat to myself “I am a boy, I am a boy.”

Of course my parents thought otherwise and Dr. Atta did not believe that at all. After all, I had now taken a second boyfriend. Naima of course threw in her usual set of lies about me crying over her shoulder that I wanted to be a girl and that the only reason that I had persisted in claiming to want to be a boy was because I was afraid of what everyone would think. Mum was totally convinced I wanted to be a girl and was doing everything to push me towards womanhood. As far as dad was concerned, I had always been his darling daughter Leyla deep down inside and that this was who I should be. Naima kept making me more and more girlish as her own perverse and draconian way of getting back at me for her childhood bullying.

When the holidays came we went away on a family trip to Doha. My sisters decided to up my regime as there was a lot more temptation in Doha and so insisted on me wearing a blinding veil everytime we left the hotel so as to preserve my purity. It was really weird being led everywhere like a lost puppy but at the same time kind of exciting. Not that I could get any relief of course. One evening when my parents went to the theatre,  Hussain came over to see me. My sisters left us alone and him and me sang cheesy pop songs in the room like a pair of love-sick kittens. Then he turned down the lights and put on soft music ready for long romantic night.

At least it was romantic for him. All I could think about was how much I missed my old girlfriend, the last one I had. A year ago we had also spent a romantic time at a hotel, in each others’ arms. Now I was the girl and Hussain was where I should be. I really missed my ex-girlfriend. I had dumped her over a childish reason. I didn’t care, as far as I knew there would be plenty of girls to come. But now I really missed her. Of course she was one of the people that my sisters had told that I wanted to be a girl. She was one of those who was hostile to me. The only time she spoke to me was when she needed to or when she wanted to make fun of me.

Anyway, me and Hussain stayed up most of night kissing and necking each other. Then, before my parents came home, Naima came in and suggested that I should break up with Hussain before I left. After all, I was now going out with Zaheer so it would only be fair to let Hussain know he could date other girls if he wanted to. As for me, I was just happy to get rid of Hussain. The less men I had to humour, the better. I also would not have to write anymore sappy debilitating letters to Hussain telling him how much I pined for him. However, I had not considered how evil Naima could be.

“So she told you then?” she asked Hussain

“Told me what?” Hussain demanded.

“That our sweet little Miss Leyla is really a boy.”

My mind screamed. Naima what are you doing? My face went deathly white as I looked back at Hussain. He thought it was a joke. Then when he looked at the terrified expression on my face he stopped laughing. “Wait a minute,” he said, “you can’t be serious.”

“See for yourself,” Naima responded. Before I noticed what she was doing, she came up to me and lifted up my skirt, swiftly yanking down my pantyhose and panties in one fell swoop to reveal the chastity belt. Then she produced the key, turned it and it swung open. My penis and balls were there for Hussain to see. I tried to push Naima away but instead my legs became tangled in my pantyhose and I stumbled in my high heels and fell on the floor. I looked up at him in terror as Naima smiled. “Farewell love birds,” she sang as she left the room.

Hussain looked at me with amazement. I slowly got up off the floor and fixed myself up. I was alone in the room with Hussain and he was between me and the door. I used to be bigger then Hussain, but he had matured and grown while I had become more girlish and small. No doubt about it, he could beat the crap out of me all he wanted. “Look,” I said, “you’re obviously upset and really pissed off at me. If you want to beat the crap out of me, I understand, but please show some mercy.”

Hussain took a step towards me. Anticipating a blow, I flinched and raised my hands up to my face. Instead he patted me on the shoulder and told me that he did not want to hurt me. He just wanted to get away from me. He said that if I wanted to be a girl, that was my business but that I had no right to fool him. He was obviously disgusted. He said he just wanted to get away from me. He headed to the door. As he was about to leave, he turned around and warned me that if anyone in town ever found out he had been dating a boy all this time, he would personally hunt me down and pummel me. I had to go down on my knees in front of Naima and beg her not tell anyone else about me. I was very grateful that he had not beaten me up.


Chapter 5

We packed up the next day and got back to Saudi. I was sinking into depression. The next day, Saffira told me she had a really big surprise for me. I groaned, that did not sound good at all. Towards the evening, Saffira told me that we were going out. Reluctantly I followed her into her car. The chauffeur drove through the city until finally we parked in front of an apartment building. Saffira led me into the building and up the elevator. She told me I was really going to love what was in store for me. I was sceptical about that. At last we reached an apartment door. Saffira knocked on the door. It was answered by a veiled figure who motioned for us to come inside. Once in she bolted the door and took off her veils and abayah to reveal a young woman who looked around Saffira’s age. She was wearing a bath robe. Smiling, she invited me and Saffira inside. Saffira told me to go sit on a nearby couch. I did so and she gave me a key; the key to my chastity belt. Saffira told me that she would pick me up later and left me alone with her strange good-looking friend.

When Saffira was gone, her friend introduced herself as Fatima. Smiling, she stood in front of me and let her bath robe fall down to the floor. She was wearing nothing but a short tight nighty that barely held her ample breasts and revealed her long shapely legs. I simply stared at her and I felt my penis harden. Fatima shook her head as all I could do was stare at her without moving. She glided on to the couch next to me and grabbed hold of my hand. “Abdul,” she said in a seductive voice, “has it really been so long that you don’t know what to do with a girl anymore? Maybe your sister is right and you really have become a girl yourself?” At first I blushed. She knew I was a boy. Then she sat up and kissed me on the lips and placed my hand on her breasts. Now I understood. She wanted me as a man. I hesitated for a moment.

Was I still capable? Did I really remember how to be a man in a relationship? I looked at cute Fatima. She smiled at me. Yes I did remember. In the next minute all the demure girlishness that I had about me vanished as I literally jumped on Fatima and gave her an aggressive passionate kiss. I threw off my feminine garments and let my long black hair down. All my feminine mannerisms that I had become so used to after a year and a half vanished. I stopped talking with a high feminine lisp and my old male voice came back. True my body looked totally feminine and slim and my breasts were still in the forefront, bobbing around. But I truly appeared like a man in a woman’s body. I really screwed Fatima and she loved it. I touched and felt every part of her great body and made her tingle. Finally I rammed my dick into her cunt and felt a rush of ecstasy come over me. Fatima let out a joyful cry as she climaxed, throwing her head back in delight.

The next day she served me breakfast in bed and we showered together. Saffira hadn’t come by yet and I wasn’t about to call her. Me and Fatima spend the day frolicking with each other and screwing around some more. I really scored with her. There was no doubt in my mind now. I was all male. I desperately wanted to be a man and to stay a man.

That evening, Saffira came to pick me up. Smiling, she told me that she hoped I had enjoyed myself but that it was time to go back home. Reluctantly, I once again donned my hateful garments, letting Fatima lock me back into my hateful belt before draping myself in layers of black. As we left, Fatima told Saffira that there was absolutely no way I was a girl. Saffira just smiled. On our way downstairs she reminded me not to get carried away. I still looked like a girl so I had better remember to keep acting like one. However, Saffira noted, I didn’t have to worry. Soon everything would be back to normal and my gender confusion would be resolved. All of this made me very happy. I would not be able to undo the humiliation of the past year and a half or the unpleasant experiences. But I felt confident that soon everything would go back to normal.


Chapter 6

The next day, my parents took me to Dr.Abbas’ new private clinic where he conducted plastic surgery. He had apparently been getting quite a name in plastic surgery and his reputation had grown immensely. I felt terrified when I saw him, after all this was the man who had given me breasts. I was however, assured by my parents that I was here so that the doctor could normalise everything. I was put under anaesthetic and joyfully anticipated waking up again with my breasts gone. When I did wake up, I was extremely dismayed to find that my breasts were still there and if anything they were bigger. Much bogger, a D-cup at least. As I sat up I felt a pain in my crotch. A sudden panic came over me. I quickly felt my crotch and there was a bandage on it. Why? I tried to call for someone but my voice was different. I looked at a mirror on the night table next to my bed. My Adam’s Apple, which had not been very prominent to begin with, was gone. My throat ached and so did my crotch. Dr.Abbas entered the room.

“What did you do to me?” I demanded. I was surprised by the sound of my own voice. It was higher and girlish.

” Well,” answered Dr.Abbas,” I covered up your Adam’s Apple, that would be a dead give away you know. I adjusted your vocal chords, giving you a higher feminine voice. Your parents didn’t think it was necessary since you spoke like a girl rather well as it was. But I convinced them that it was safer and was worth it as long as I was covering your Adam’s Apple. And of course I removed your penis and testicles and constructed a vagina in their place. “

I let out a hoarse screech in my new voice. “How could you! No! This can’t be happening! “

Dr.Abbas shook his head. “Look kid, I just did what your shrink and parents told me to do.” I couldn’t believe it. “I hope you’re happy,” he continued, “this operation isn’t reversible.” The next day he took off the bandages. There it was, my new cunt. I broke down crying. Later on I posed naked in front of a mirror. Staring back at me was my reflection. Now I totally looked like a hot teenage girl. I had long ebony hair. A shapely body. Large breasts and finally, a vagina. I spent the next week at Dr. Abbas’ clinic recuperating.

My mother and Naima came to stay with me. I screamed at them, but I just sounded pathetic with my new voice. Mum told me to stop being obnoxious. I should have known this was coming. I should stop pretending and realise that this was what I had always wanted. I was now fully a woman and could expect to stay that way for the rest of my life. I already knew that this was true. I guess I should have seen this coming. But I really did not want to be a girl. I could not imagine living the rest of my life as one.

The next few weeks were rough. At home I would periodically break out into tantrums during which I would lash out at anything or anyone around me. Finally I would collapse onto the floor and lie there sobbing. Or I would lie on the floor and thrash around. If my parents began to believe that they had made a mistake, they didn’t show it.

I never did see Fatima again. I now understood what Saffira had been up to. She had not done me a favour. My time with Fatima was more like a condemned man’s last meal before execution. This was my sisters’ ultimate revenge. I had experienced incredible sex with a woman. Now I would never have that feeling again. Now I would no longer be able to have sex with women, I would be on the receiving end from now on. The thought chilled me.

At least once I got “the chop” my life in settled down. Now that I was “all girl” my sisters quit bothering me so often. I guess they were all overawed by the fact that I had actually been castrated. After my operation mum and dad told everyone that Abdul had emigrated to America and that Leyla would now be living with them permanently. They had a massive garage sale where I had to watch as all of my old male belongings were sold. Then there was the final horrid thing that my evil sisters did. Naima had asked Dr. Abbas to preserve my genitals in a jar. Dr. Abbas had agreed. One night when my mother and father were out, my sisters showed me the jar. Then they lit a fire in our yard and forced me to throw my penis and genitals into the blaze. I had to watch as what once was my maleness burn to a crisp. After which I promptly threw up.


Chapter 7

Now that I was fully a woman – biologically that is, I still feel like a man inside – dad said that it was time for me to get married as I was at the age when most Saudi girls start to think about marriage. Mum and dad had had been looking at several men as suitable candidates for Saffira and Saeeda since they were also at the marriageable age and they said they would merely extend the search for a husband for me as well, but that it would be difficult because I couldn’t have children of my own. The thought of being in a wedding dress reduced me to tears. I had always fantasised about marrying a sweet attractive woman and living a great life with her as my partner. Now I was going to be the sweet attractive woman who would make my husband very happy. I felt like throwing up.

One day several months later they announced my engagement. Not just my engagement but mine and Saffira’s… to the same guy! He was a sixty-two year old businessman with a lot of money and a big beard. His name was Rashid and he was looking for a new wife because he had just buried his first and divorced his second because she was no longing pleasing to him. He had heard about my beauty and Saffira’s and approached my dad. He’d asked Saffira who agreed. I was never even asked. At first I couldn’t understand why Saffira would marry such an old guy but then she told me that she hoped he would die soon as he was old and smoked a lot. Then she would take over everything as first wife, including me. I asked if he minded that I couldn’t have children but dad said that he did not. He’d already had plenty of children with his first two wives and could always have more with Saffira. He was just taking me on as a kind of sex toy. I threw up when dad told me that.

On our wedding day Saffira and I were dressed in large puffy white dresses with tightly-laced waists. I could hardly breathe. Over the top were thick white veils that blinded us completely. During the whole ceremony and party I sat in darkness as everyone celebrated around me. Then we were led away to our new home on the other side of the city.

At our new house Rashid removed our veils and then explained to Saffira and me our future lives. He said that he was very strict about how his women should live and that in his opinion the only times a woman should leave the house are on her wedding day and for her funeral. So, there were to be no more shopping trips or social visits to other women. My house was also my prison. Inside the house we were to be veiled and gagged at all times save for eating, using the toilet and when he wanted us for sexual purposes. Then he flipped a coin to see who he would deflower first, (he thought that we were both virgins and precautions had been taken to maintain the illusion). It came up heads which meant Saffira. I was taken to my new room by a maid, stripped completely including the hated chastity belt, showered and then shown my new bedroom attire. There was a black ball gag that was buckled behind my head and padlocked, and a large sack that I had to climb into. It was made of very thick material and it blinded me completely. The only holes in it (after the one that I climbed in through was zipped up and locked), were for my hands. They were covered in thick leather gloves and then handcuffed behind my back to prevent ‘fiddling’. So, even after all this time I could not achieve release. I tried rubbing my new vagina against the bed but I could get nowhere near climax and in the end I fell asleep frustrated.

The following night Rashid had me in his bed. Once he had unveiled me, he grew very horny saying that I was the hottest girl he had ever been with. Like Zaheer he was very rough and liked to use all my holes. He also liked rubbing his knarled fingers over my tender breasts and his beard over my face. I still feel sick every time he gets near me. His breath stinks and he is only interested in his own pleasure. Still, when he uses my vagina I get some release but even so the thought of being with a man when I am a man myself, mentally at least.

My life now is a living hell. Rashid lived up to his promise of treating me as his personal sex object. He rarely takes Saffira to his bed, so pleased is he with my appearance and performance and there is always at least one of my holes aching from his rough advances. Not that Saffira minds of course; she prefers for him to stay away as that gives her more time with Aisha the maid, with whom she is conducting a lesbian relationship. I realise now that a lot of her actions with me are not about anything I have done to her personally, but simply because she hates men in general and I am the only one that she can wreak revenge on.

Although he doesn’t know I used to be a man, Rashid has worked out that my breasts were enlarged and she liked it so much that I have since had to undergo several more augmentations so that I now have two enormous perfectly round and fake-looking breasts on my chest. I have also had collagen implants in my lips so that I pout continually, (or at least whenever I am not gagged which is rare), and implants in my buttocks which are now so huge that I feel like I am sitting on cushions. He has also insisted that I dye my hair blonde and have permanent fingernail extensions so that even when my hands are not handcuffed behind me, I can do little with them. Finally, my tongue has been pierced so that my cock-sucking is even better for him than before and I have had large rings inserted in my nipples. These keep them constantly erect and me ready for sex. Worse though, when he is angry I am chained to the wall by them whilst he canes my enhanced arse. Each time the chain tugs on them the pain is unbearable.

In short I look like a total slut which is all that I am now. As I never leave the house, my whole life is dedicated to servicing him. After waking I am veiled and restrained, with at least one layers always covering my eyes and my hands always cuffed behind my back so that Aisha has to feed me and take me to the toilet. It is extremely humiliating. Recently I have had one more ritual added to my daily routine: a new exercise regime. The new exercise consists of a stationery bike. There is a difference, however. Instead of a horizontal saddle, this bike has a vertical one. Rashid started me at ten kilometres each day, currently I am at thirty kilometres, impaled on the bike for more than an hour. He says it has done wonders for my already large buttocks.

Whenever Rashid is not away from the house, he likes me near him. He may be watching TV or talking with friends and I must be always knelt at his side like a dog. Whenever he is alone he regularly gets his cock out and orders me to suck it. He has even introduced a special gag where the middle can be taken out so that it becomes a ring gag so that I can suck cock without him going to the trouble of unbuckling it. Of course I can’t speak gagged in such a way but he doesn’t care. He has never been interested in me in any way save for how I can be fucked.

The worst times are whenever he watches a game of football. At the start of our marriage he decided that I would receive one fuck for every goal scored. If his team wins then the sex will be conventional, if they draw it is oral and if they lose, anal. It is the World Cup next month and I am dreading it. Last time in Japan Saudi Arabia lost eight-nil to Germany.

So that is my life as Leyla, certainly not the one that I would have chosen that is for sure. When I think about what it would have been like if I’d not tried those veils on that day I cry for hours. I am used to being a girl physically now but being Rashid’s sex toy is unbearable. I just pray to Allah that he dies soon which he may as he coughs all the time from all the cigarettes that he smokes, but then I doubt that things will get better. Saffira has already told me about some of the plans they have for me when we are both widows and she is in charge. I need say no more…

 

Mastana: Part 5

Part 4

Again she was disturbed from her reveries, this time by her servant tapping her on her veiled shoulder. Mastana got up knowing what was to come, for it was the same everyday. It was time for the Zuhr prayer. She followed her three other shrouded sisters into the Rang Mahal where their prayer mats were laid out ready for them. They got into position and waited and after a minute or so the sound of the muezzin in the palace mosque echoed across the courtyard and into the chamber. Mastana performed her prayers as she did everyday. Prior to her incarceration in the palace she had never been particularly religious and deep down she suspected that she still was not, but recently she had begun to find strength and solace in the reflective ambience of prayer.

Not that reflection was something that she would be unable to do later, quite the opposite in fact for everyday following the Zuhr prayers the king had decreed that all of his wives must enjoy a Contemplation Hour… well, all of them unless he had an urge for something else!

Silently her girl servant climbed under her burqa and guided her arms to the back. Then she fastened the sleeve around them so that they were fixed, elbow to wrist behind her back. Of course, she was pretty much unable to use her hands anyway, but this further immobilised her and forced her into an upright position which encouraged contemplation. It was all based on the practices of the suspect pir whom the king was much influenced by and who, like many Sufis, advocated the quiet reflective life.

The girl exited and then helped her mistress to stand. A thick black shroud was then draped over her so that her world became totally dark and her hearing was further muted. Then she was led to the wall where her Contemplation Cushion was positioned. She knelt on this and then the girl crawled under her layers and fastened the straps the went over her legs forcing her to stay in the kneeling position. Then with her back against the wall, she was left to contemplate.

When their husband had introduced the Contemplation Hour to his wives he had instructed them to focus their minds on Allah and His Prophet but even though she tried hard, Mastana was never able to do that for long. Always, after but a few minutes her mind drifted to the topic that occupied most of her thoughts both waking and sleeping. Rather than relaxing her, the forced position made her more aware of the rings in her nipples and clitoris and the more she was aware of them the more she thought of them and the more she got aroused. She felt her breasts pushing hard against the tight fabric of the salwar kameez due to the position her sleeve forced her into. In the past her breasts had never pressed hard against her clothes and had never been that impressive at all, mere handfuls if that, but immediately following their marriage the king had had all his wives checked into the Cure Hospital and gifted them with generous implants. The result was two firm globes that jutted out from her chest lewdly, without any sag whatsoever. She remembered when she’d woken up in the hospital bed and felt the extra weight on her chest and been angry, angered that she was being turned into some sort of sex object. But at night when the king lay with her and caressed them, tingles of joy had fluttered through her body and she had felt very sexy and desirable.

Except that she wasn’t, Mastana wasn’t sexy and desirable at all, because Mastana no longer existed. Her head encased in black plastic she was a nobody these days. Valeriya had had large fake breasts and so he had given his wives fake breasts. Was it Mastana he was making love to or was it Valeriya? She did not even need to answer her own question yet despite the awful truth she still longed for his touch, still obsessed about him and…

What’s that, a hand on her shoulder? Surely the Contemplation Hour is not over yet. It’s impossible to measure time in a silent black world but it doesn’t seem long enough…

She is guided along the corridors and she knows, yes indeed, Contemplation Hour is not over at all, her three sisters are still knelt their in silence. But he has an urge and today she has been chosen! Excitement pulses through her veins and her beauty lips moisten. Not that she will receive what she wants there, that is haram, but even so, even the other type, to provide him with pleasure, that is enough.

The walking stops and first the shroud and then the burqa are removed. Then the sleeve is unlaced and she is allowed to flex her stiff arms. Then the rest of her clothes are removed until she stands there in the middle of the king’s bedchamber wearing just her hood and hands.

Across the middle of the bed is a stiff leather bolster. Mastana knows well its purpose and she gets onto the bed and crawls up to it, positioning in under her stomach so that she is provided with support. Then two padded rods are produced. The first goes in front of her thighs and the second behind them so that she can neither move forwards or backwards. Then the girl fastens her wrists to the head of the bed and then it is time for the final piece of her bedtime preparations. Her servant brings out an item of rubber with long golden tresses attached to it. Locked into place as she is, she cannot see it, but she knows all too well what it is. The servant takes the rubber hood and fits it over her blank plastic head encasement. The fit is perfect as it was expensively made to her own particular specifications. Once smoothed out and the eye holes carefully aligned then she is ready for the king and the two servants retire. Mastana merely waits in anticipation and as she does she gazes at the image that confronts her in the large mirror at the foot of the bed.

Valeria-Lukyanova-Vital-Statistics

The doll-like unsmiling face of Valeriya stares back at her with her long blonde hair and huge blue anime-like eyes. Inside her blood boils as she realises that once again, she has been turned into someone – or something – else purely for the satisfaction of a man whom she never chose, who stole from her a promising career and life of freedom. The anger fills her veins and she wishes to explode with rage.

Then the door opens and she hears him come in. In a second the anger disappears and desire takes over. Like her mother said to her when she last visited two days ago, she was called ‘Mastana’ for a reason.

She hasn’t got a care in the world.

Mastana: Part 4

Part 3

Six months later

The Harem of the King’s Palace

Queen Mastana of Afghanistan, one of the four Wives of Equal Standing of King Muhammad Akbar Khan, stretched herself out on the grass in the Women’s Garden of the Darul Aman Palace. Not that she could feel that grass of course, these days all that Queen Mastana felt was cloth and plastic, but it was nice to be out there, the warm sun beating down on her and the faint song of birds in the air. Just across from her sat the three other queens playing with a new kitten that the king had given them all that morning, but Mastana has lost interest in both the cat and her ‘sisters’. For a few minutes she wanted to be alone.

“What am I? What is my life?” she said to herself silently. She could not say it out loud because of the solid gag that filled her mouth twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. She hadn’t spoken a single word or indeed made even the faintest sound with her mouth for over four months now and she wondered that, if the gag ever were removed, she would remember how to do so. To think, she who had once engaged in debates, chatted to her friends – male and female – on the phone and in cafés in no less than four different languages. But that was when she had not been a member of the Royal family, now everything had changed.

For starters there was her dress. She was clad in the most beautiful and expensive outfit imaginable. From the outside all that was visible was her burqa, and what a burqa it was! Yellow silk with the finest embroidery. No arm holes of course, since they weren’t really needed these days, but beautiful pleats billowing out at the back when she walked. She always wore a burqa these days, it was mandatory for a queen to be covered at all times, but even though she had rebelled against the garments at first, now her favourite part of the day was after she awoke in the mornings and she chose which burqa she would be wearing that day. She had dozens to select from, all of the highest quality and uniquely crafted by some of the finest fashion designers in the world and she loved viewing herself in the mirror as she tried them on.

But under that burqa there were other fine clothes. A silken salwar kameez set in deep blue with more exquisite embroidery and on her hands black embroidered silk gloves. Under the salwar kameez she had the finest black panty hose and her underwear was an extremely alluring lacy bra and knickers which made her feel very sexy indeed. She loved the feeling of them on her and of the silk brushing her skin. It made her feel special, hell, she was a queen, she was special!

Mastana shifted her position onto her side and two tiny bells tinkled. They reminded her then as they always reminded her of the places where they were attached to, her aroused and pierced nipples. Instinctively her hands rose to caress them but of course, she could feel nothing. She longed to relieve her frustration but it was impossible and so the frustration just grew and grew.

With these feelings, Mastana’s thoughts turned to her husband. She remembered when she had first seen him, dimly through the pinholes of her hood and the grill of her burqa at the coronation. And then that night when the four wives, all identically dressed had been led from the banqueting hall to his bedroom. They were all stripped naked save for their blank black plastic hoods and blank black plastic hands. That was the first and only time that she saw her sisters’ unclothed. It was weird, they looked like anonymous robot clones, inhuman almost, created merely to pleasure a man. Then she realised with horror that she looked identical to them, she was a sex droid as well and at that moment she hated the king for what he had done to her.

His bed was huge and they were all made to lie down on it, Mastana the second from the right. Her outstretched legs were raised and fastened to two chains hanging from the ceiling of the bed, her equally outstretched arms fastened to two other hanging chains. All the other wives were similarly restrained, all four identical, chained and helpless in a row. Tradition insisted on virgins being taken like that in case they might try to harm their Master.

Then they waited, in the dark and the silence. After some time he came. He stripped slowly, but she couldn’t see him, only the ceiling above her head. Then she heard him kneel down next to him and a gasp as he entered the wife to her left. He pumped in and out of her for a minute or so then exited and came to her. This was not how she had envisaged losing her precious virginity! To a husband, yes, but chained like a mare, unable to see or move! But whether it was what she expected or not, it was what happened. She felt his hands caress her breasts and play with the rings and bells adorning her nipples and then his manhood pressed against her beauty lips. Slowly but surely he entered her now moist passage and with a powerful thrust he broke through her virgin hymen. Oh how degrading! How awful! She felt so violated and used and yet, perversely, at the same time, it excited her beyond all measure. She began to enjoy his thrusts and feel her long-awaited climax draw nearer but then, without a word he exited. No!! No!!! She wanted him in her! Come back! But he was already penetrating her sister to the right. She listened with intense jealousy as he plunged in and out of her, before exiting and entering his fourth wife. It was only with that last wife that he came and how jealous she was, surely she should have had his seed! Oh how she hated her husband yet at the same time, oh how she longed for him… oh how she longed.

She recalled a conversation with Taahira, the wife from the Barakzai clan about a week or so after they became queens. Conversations between the wives were difficult and limited. With their encased hands they could not write and with their gagged mouths they could not talk, but every day for an hour in the afternoon the King allowed them to communicate with the aid of special computers. These had enormous over-sized keyboards which her blunt and rigid hands could operate, albeit very slowly. They typed their messages laboriously letter by letter and they appeared on the screen. That was the only time that they could communicate with another human being.

They were talking that day, as they did most days for there was little else to talk about, about their husband. Although he was not particularly handsome and some of his sexual predilections a little strange, Mastana found herself longing for his attentions which was awful since he only slept with each wife every fourth night. She wondered why and so decided to ask her sister.

So is it surprising that I find myself longing for his touch and dreaming of him?

And I dream about him, too replied Taahira. It’s partly those pictures everywhere on the ceilings. They’re the last thing you see at night in the bedroom and the first thing you see in the morning.

It was true, in each of the queen’s rooms there was a large portrait of their husband to gaze at on the ceiling above their beds. And it was no normal royal portrait but instead a view of him naked, his manhood jutting out firm and strong.

Yes, they really understand women in Afghanistan added Mastana. In some ways I hate him for how he has destroyed my old life and turned me into some sort of sex slave but I also simply can’t help secretly admiring him.

All the queens in the harem do. He’s so strong and virile! So ruthless! It makes you jealous, jealous of the other wives.

It is brainwashing, I know it, yet I can’t help it, I need him right now and I need him every minute of every day!

It was true, he used psychology to transform her. Six months ago her mind had been focussed on study and the future, now all she thought about was pleasing him. She imagined lying in his bed, wearing the…

A gong sounded. The other wives stopped playing with the kitten and Mastana was shaken from her reverie. They all got up off the grass and trooped indoors, their colourful burqas billowing behind them like the sails of a great fleet of galleons. Inside they walked noiselessly, their soft slippers making no sound on the marble floor, across the Rang Mahal to the Moti Mahal where they all sat cross-legged on the floor, their burqas draped elegantly around them. It was lunchtime and today the same ritual was followed as everyday. Firstly the first four servants would bring each queen a glass of water to wash out their throat so that the food may be tasted better. Each servant, a young girl of about twelve dressed in a gorgeous salwar kameez in colours that matched her mistress’ burqa, would approach the queen bowing, then kneel down before them, carefully lift the burqa so that none of the person beneath was revealed and climb underneath. Then they would attach a drinking tube to the hood of the queen and guide the other end into the glass of water.

When the water was finished the girl would remove it and place it outside of the burqa. The second four servants, all of these grown women dressed in burqas of matching colour but lesser quality than the queens and who had served their apprenticeships as the young girls were currently doing under the last four queens, would then approach, remove the empty glass and replace it with a bowl of soup. The girl would take this and guide it under the burqa to the drinking tube and then tap her mistress on the breast to signify she could “eat” her meal. This she would do and then when finished the empty bowl would be placed outside the burqa and replaced by the second servant by a glass of fruit juice. When this is finished the final course would be provided, a bowl of yoghurt or perhaps some blended fruits. Then, to wash it all down there would be tea.

As Mastana sucked down today’s meal – lentil soup with mango juice and then plain yogurt – she mused on how her mealtimes had changed. She so used to enjoy her food! She loved lamb kebabs and in India some of the hot curries! But now she was always hungry and although the soups, yoghurts and fruits were tasty, they were more like drinks than foods. Still, they had one positive effect: she had no need to worry about putting on weight. They also contributed to her new toilet routine which at first she had found most strange and humiliating but now, perversely, like everything else about her royal life, quite normal.

On her first day in the palace after the king had taken her virginity along with those of his other wives, after she had woken she was led by her two servants to the bathroom which adjoined her chamber and was lit by tiny skylights in the domed ceiling. Looking around she’d noticed a cupboard high up on the wall that had been opened to reveal three large glass bottles, each containing a different coloured and strongly scented liquid. The liquid in the first bottle was green and soapy-looking, the next was bright red and fizzy like sherbet and the third was bright blue. The sides of all three bottles were graduated to show how much liquid each had dispensed.

Hanging down to the floor from each bottle was a long length of rubber tubing. The tubes terminated in a strangely shaped nozzle made of stiffer rubber. Little taps at the end of each tube enabled an operator to use his experience to repeatedly close down the supply of one liquid to the nozzle and to momentarily open one of the other two.

The work of the operator, who turned out to be the older servant in the burqa – the girl in the salwar kameez was there to assist and to watch and learn as she was undergoing her apprenticeship – was thus not unlike that of a skilled barmaid making up a complex cocktail.

The end of the nozzle itself was gently pointed and covered in grease, but it then quickly became quite large, like a lozenge. However, a few inches back from the tip of the nozzle, there was a strange circular indentation where the nozzle became much smaller. Mastana did not at first realise the purpose of all this. However, she was soon to learn that this was a traditional harem enema and it was very different than those simpler ones used in health clubs such as she had tried once when on a trip to Malaysia with some fellow students at the university. With its choice of different highly scented liquids, it was designed to give a better and more carefully controlled clean out and finish. This was not for medical purposes but rather, in the harem, to prepare the way for the king to enjoy to his heart’s content a popular Afghani pastime – the penetration of the cleaned and scented rear orifice of a wife.

King Muhammad Akbar Khan had the reputation, to everyone outside the women’s quarter of his palace, of being a rather puritanical and religious man. And this was in fact partially true since King Muhammad Akbar Khan had “found” religion some four years ago at the Shrine of Khwaja Abu Nasr Parsa. However, before that life-shattering event he had been quite a different man indeed. He had gone to Moscow to study at the university there and whilst in the decadent West had indulged in all manner of haram sexual activities. In particular he had fallen under the spell of a beautiful blonde Ukrainian woman named Valeriya who had pushed forward the boundaries of his sexual knowledge more than he would have thought possible. She was a strange woman indeed, incredibly skilled in the harem arts and with an appearance almost like a cartoon doll which, Mastana was told, is a fashion in that part of the world.

Anyway, the long and short of it was that Muhammad Akbar Khan had fallen into depraved ways, but whilst enjoying his Muscovite life in one way, he also felt a profound sense of guilt. So it was that after his return he went on the Hajj to see if he could mend his ways but he could not follow the strict injunctions of the Wahaabi mullahs who told him to stick only to his wives – who did not, of course, include Valeriya who had now begun a modelling career – and stray away from perversions. He lapsed but still wanting to attain salvation he went to the holy shrine and sought the advice of a renowned pir there.

This pir, who was from a Sufi tradition far removed from the puritanical Wahaabis of Saudi Arabia explained to him that to have pleasure in sexual activities was only natural and that he should not feel ashamed for enjoying women’s bodies. He cited the Prophet himself as an example who famously loved women and was said to have been an excellent lover. But he cautioned that Muhammad Akbar Khan should only fornicate with his wives though how he did this was of no concern. However, the issue of his having given his heart to Valeriya could be resolved in an Islamic way as Mastana was soon to learn.

But returning to her first toilet, the younger servant pointed to a rubber mat on the floor under the strange-looking bottles. She gestured for her to kneel down on it on all fours. Mystified and nervously Mastana quickly did so.

In front of her, low down on the edge of the mat, was a strange-looking wooden contraption that rather reminded her of an old fashioned stocks. It was hinged and there were small holes and it was securely fastened to the floor.

Before she realised what was happening, the older servant had put her two wrists into the bottom half of the holes and then closed the stocks. Her hands were now held helpless, down close to the floor.

Then, assisted by the girl, the older servant quickly fastened her ankles to the side of the mat with little straps. With her immobile encased hands fastened in the stocks, she could not stop him. Then a padded bar was slipped under her belly to keep her nicely raised. She was now firmly secured kneeling on all fours with her knees parted and her rear orifice well displayed.

The older servant picked up the operator’s stool and, placing it behind Mastana between her outstretched knees, sat down on it. She stroked the queen’s trembling bottom with her gloved hands reassuringly but Mastana still did not quite understand what was going to happen.

The apprentice turned on the taps of each of the three coloured tubes in turn to test that all was well. She was rewarded by little jets of three differently-coloured liquids shooting out from the tip of the nozzle onto the tiled floor. Satisfied, she handed the nozzle to the older servant.

Suddenly, Mastana felt the servant’s hands part her cheeks. She blushed as she felt the end of the greased nozzle press against her rear orifice. It slipped in and she felt the servant slowly pushing it up her. Then she stopped; the sphincter muscles round her rear orifice had closed around the indentation in the nozzle, holding it tightly in place. She would not be able to eject it.

Then the girl momentarily turned on the blue tap. No! No!’ Mastana screamed inwardly as she felt a little jet of the liquid shoot up into her, cleaning her as it did so. Frantically she tried to reach back to pull out the nozzle, but her hands were firmly held by the stocks. Then she tried in vain to shake it out, opening and closing her muscles desperately. But her sphincter held it equally firmly in place.

The girl again gave the blue tap another little two quick twists, provoking further movement from Mastana who was now shaking her belly and hips to and fro, in an automatic, but vain, attempt to stop the burning liquid from going further up her

Then the girl switched taps and gave her a good dose, of the red fizzy liquid. She closed the blue tap, opened the red one and left it open.

Mastana at first calmed down as this new liquid seemed to neutralise the awful first one. Then she began to shake again as she felt its strange fizzy action inside her.

The servant got up off her stool and went and stood by the kneeling queen’s side to get a better view of her now slowly swelling belly. She nodded as Mastana writhed in vain on the mat whilst the fizzy liquid slowly and inexorably penetrated deeper and deeper.

The servant put her hand down and felt her mistress’ stomach. Yes, she would soon be ready for the green soap and then for a return to the blue burning liquid. It was, always better to do it by stages, with the belly being made to give a good little shake between each one. She sat down on the stool behind her again and turned off the red tap. Mastana let out a gasp of relief as she felt the liquid stop. But the relief was short-lived, for the servant then motioned for the  girl to turn on the green tap.

Mastana gave another little cry as she felt the soapy liquid swelling up inside her. After another minute the servant reached forward and felt her stomach again. Yes, it was getting very nicely swollen. She would let it run for another minute and then finish off with another shot of the Blue Burner, before she was left for five minutes, whilst all three liquids completed their cleaning tasks.

A minute later and Mastana writhed again as she felt the blue burning liquid shoot up inside her. Now keep still the servant wrote on a notice which she thrust in front of her mistress’ face. This was always a tricky moment. She put the bowl down on the floor between her legs – just in case. The girl was standing beside her holding a well-greased rubber plug. It had a circular indentation, like the one on at the rear of the nozzle, for the queen’s sphincter to grip. Slowly she began to withdraw the nozzle, easing it past the sphincter. Mastana gave a sight of relief. Oh how she longed to release everything. Quickly she pulled out the nozzle, grabbed the plug from the girl and pushed it in. Yes, the sphincter was holding it. She got up from the stool. It was time for a coffee.

Five minutes later the girl was feeding the queen coffee through her drinking tube whilst her mistress was still in the stocks, her belly full of the cleaning liquids. When she had finished the servant gestured to the girl to remove the plug and to hold up the bowl so that all the liquids – and Mastana’s wastes – flowed out.

Then it was time to repeat the process. But this time there was nothing left to be washed out and the emphasis was more on the liquids’ pleasing scents than on their cleansing properties. The queen was left exhausted and utterly degraded by it all but after the ritual she did not need to use the toilet all day and with her liquid diet, there were few wastes to expel anyway. The elaborate enemas had now become part of her daily life, a natural function taken away from her, but also with a secondary benefit for the king: his favourite orifice was now ready for his use.

Afghani men, many of whom are brought up without female company or indeed ever seeing an unveiled woman other than their mother or sister, are infamous for seeking sexual solace elsewhere as teenagers and so it was with Muhammad Akbar Khan. When he had gone to Russia and met with Valeriya all that had changed, but he still retained a preference for using the rear orifice and besides, it had an added advantage: his religion insisted that he treat all wives equally with regards to intercourse, only using specific wives on allotted nights. However, the pir had informed him that congress using that orifice did not count as a valid sexual act since children could never be produced that way and so, so long as he still enjoyed his allotted wife in the evening, he could enjoy additional sessions with whichever wife he fancied so long as they were of this nature.

And since King Muhammad Akbar Khan was a man with a vivacious sexual appetite, then he often availed himself of this loophole in religious law!

Part 5

Mastana: Part 3

Part 2

About an hour later the nurse and Dr. Rastagar and greeted her. She was fed some water through a tube which she gulped down thirstily but then, to her dismay, the nurse got a strap and put it over her head, fastening it securely to the bed so that all she could see was the ceiling up above her. Then several more straps were placed over her, securing her body with her arms and their now-useless hands by its side, firmly to the bed. They then turned their attentions to her feet which were lifted in the air and put through stirrups. Straps were then passed around her ankles holding them there. She was helpless and vulnerable, her most private parts exposed to the world.

Then to her surprise, she felt fingers parting her beauty lips and begin tickling her clitoris. Immediately she became aroused and started to moan into her gag. The tickling continued as the clitoris swelled and then she felt it being firmly bound around the base with a cotton thread making it extend outwards between the beauty lips.

Then it was the turn of the helpless Mastana’s nipples to be aroused and similarly bound with cotton threat. She could feel her nipples were now greatly extended. But why she asked herself, unable to move to touch them.

She heard Dr. Rastagar saying something about leaving them to get nicely swollen, and then she heard their footsteps going away.

Silenced and secured, Mastana just lay helpless on her back, wondering what on earth was happening. What was being done to her and why? What had all this to do with treating the tribes equally?

After a few minutes, she heard footsteps coming back into the room a noise like a hospital trolley being wheeled in. As it was being brought up to the couch, she heard a rattling noise like surgical instruments on a metal tray. Astaghfirullah, what was this, an operation?!

Mastanaa heard bottles being opened. There was a sudden smell of antiseptic and she heard a liquid being poured. Then she gasped as one of the figures, Dr. Rastagar most probably, wiped a cloth, soaked in a strange freezing liquid, over her beauty lips. They seemed to lose feeling. She hardly felt it when she then parted her lips again and applied the cloth to her bound and swollen beauty bud. She felt her beauty lips being clipped back leaving her swollen and bound clitoris projecting and on display.

Then there was noise as if a little lamp was being lit. She could feel the heat of the flame. Something seemed to be being heated in the flame. She felt her swollen clitoris being pulled out. Then she felt a prick as if something sharp and hot had been gently pushed through the cotton thread binding her clitoris and was now touching it. She automatically tried to raise her head to see what horror was being done to her, but of course it was futile and she could see nothing but the featureless ceiling above. Then she screamed into her gag as, unknown to her, a red-hot needle was expertly thrust right through her clitoris.

It was held there momentarily and she then she could feel it being alternatively turned left and right. Then it was withdrawn. Mastana gasped with relief. But to her horror, she then felt something else being pushed through. It seemed to be covered in some sort of creamy grease. She felt whatever it was being pulled to and fro. Next she felt a flame being brought right up to her beauty lips making her tremble with fear. She had the impression that the flame was being used to braze something together, brazed permanently. But what? And why?

She felt the cotton threads round her beauty bud being undone. She could feel some of the swelling subsiding, but now there was a strange feeling, as if her clitoris was being held permanently extended outwards – and permanently aroused. She also felt something metallic between her outstretched legs. She felt hands admiringly touching something that seemed to be attached to her. What had they done to her? She moved slightly in her embarrassment and again felt the metal object. Astaghfirullah! What was it?

Then it was the turn of her nipples. Again she felt a cloth soaked in a freezing liquid. Then she felt something sharp being pressed against one of her bound and extended nipples. Again she screamed into her gag as it was driven right through and again turned left and right, and then withdrawn.

Then once again something else was pushed through this new hole. It too was moved to and fro, and was greased. Again she felt the heat of the flame as if something was being carefully brazed together.

Now it was the turn of her other nipple.

She felt the cotton threads around each swollen nipple being removed. As with her beauty bud, she felt some of the swelling subsiding, but there was a new feeling of it being held permanently erect. But this time there a difference. There was a weight on each breast and with every little quiver of her breasts she heard the tinkling of a little bell. What was it? She longed to sit up and see what dreadful thing had been done to her but, still strapped to the top of the couch, there was nothing, absolutely nothing she could do.

The green niqaab nurse came into view, stroked her head and then unstrapped it before moving down to her body straps. Mastana sat up and looked down at herself, Her legs were still fastened to the stirrups. She saw large sized thin golden rings had been inserted into her nipples! And to each ring a small bell was attached. Astaghfirullah!

She looked down at her parted legs. From between her now hairless beauty lips hung another golden ring. It had been put through her precious beauty bud and seemed to be making her constantly aroused! She saw that it had been inserted so that it hung neatly parallel to, and between, her beauty lips and not awkwardly at right angles across them. She was now ringed in her most sensitive and private places and those rings caused great arousal. But it was arousal that she could do nothing about for when she put her rigid, plastic-clad hands to the rings, they were too blunt, too unwieldy to allow her to pleasure herself.

After being released from hospital, covered with a burqa again and driven to the family home, Mastana had to try and get used to her ‘preparations’ for becoming a queen of Afghanistan. To start with, it was hell. She longed to rip off the awful plastic helmet that most silenced and encased her. It made her feel claustrophobic and, as was the intention, anonymous. But how could with useless plastic hands, more like spoons on the end of her arms. She could grip nothing, feel nothing, all she could do was produced a soft clacking sound as she pounded at her own head in desperation. On the first night in bed, unable to sleep, staring at the world through the tiny pinholes which were all she was allowed now, she got up and started banging her head against the wall. It did nothing of course, except give her a headache and wake the entire household. There was no relief, she was a silent, anonymous droid and she shuddered as she felt her personality seemingly seep away.

People treated her differently. Since she couldn’t speak with them or indeed make any meaningful communication at all beyond a yes and no, then they took to ignoring her even when she was present in the room. Without thinking servants would talk about her as if she wasn’t there and family members began to act, not as if she were a living person with them in the room, but instead some lifeless statue whom they spoke about respectfully yet with a tinge of sadness as if she were a great hero who had died in battle.

It was perhaps that treatment that finally did it. If they were to act as if she had died, then why live? What right had the nation of Afghanistan to deprive her of everything that she was, all her hopes and dreams, even her face and voice so that its mad mullahs would no longer cause the people to kill each other? No, that was their problem; if she was gone all they would do is find another sacrificial lamb? That night she crept out of bed and went to the window. There was a drop of two storeys. She leaned out…

After her suicide attempt things changed. She hadn’t died in the fall, indeed she hadn’t even hurt herself seriously. True, the drop had been two storeys, but the blow was softened by bushes planted at the foot of the house and, cocooned in their plastic prisons, her hands and head had been perfectly cushioned.

After the suicide attempt her father had talked to her. He had chastised her for trying to desert her duty and alter her destiny. He reminded her that life is a gift from Allah and she had no right to forfeit. Then he’d bent her over, bared her bottom and given her ten whacks with his cane so that her cheeks were red raw. After that though, he cuddled her and said that whilst he had to punish her sin, he understood her frustrations and plight, and that he would do something to help. All she could do was nod silently.

After he left, her mother came. She put her arm around her daughter and then spoke softly, “We women have ways to make it bearable.” Then, she took the rings that adorned her daughter’s nipples and played with them. She turned them in her fingers and beneath her mask, Mastana groaned in ecstasy. “It is improper for a mother to do more than this,” she then said, “but I shall instruct a special friend of mine She will make life bearable for you.”

That night things were different to before. To ensure that she no longer tried to commit suicide, she was not chained to her bed, a cuff around each ankle and wrist leading to each of the four bedposts. Then, in order to stop her from banging her head, a padded cover was drawn over her helmet. It had only one hole at the nose and so left her blind and her hearing muted. So there she lay, spread out like a starfish in the pitch black. Silence reigned but then the door opened. Who was it? Footsteps came over to her and she felt her sheets being removed. Someone sat next to her. It was a female and she smelt sweet, prepared with oils and attar. She nestled her rounded buttocks next to Mastana and then started playing with her nipple rings just as her mother had. Mastana groaned and an unfamiliar voice whispered, “Aha! You’re enjoying that I see! Now, how about this.”

The mystery hands left the rings in her breasts and crept down to her exposed crotch. Mastana longed to cover herself, protect herself, but as she was all she could too was proffer herself like a wanton. She felt something being tied to the ring, a string and then pulled tight, but not so it hurt. Then it started, a soft strumming of the string, like a harpist caressing the strings of their instrument. This mystery woman was playing her and the music was heavenly. Still strumming, the woman climbed on top of her immobile charge and started kissing her and caressing her buttocks. Within minutes Mastana exploded in ecstasy. The woman slumped onto her and then moved her head next to Mastana’s ear. “You see,” she said, “it is not all bad. Forget the past and immerse yourself in your new existence. If you remember what was you shall only be miserable. Live not for studies or money but for pleasure now and you shall be happy.”

And with those words, the mystery woman left, leaving Mastana to the pitch black, panting, spread-eagled on the bed. Yes indeed, the old life had gone, she must become someone new, someone who lived for pleasure, a pleasure that she would soon be experiencing with a man, not a woman.

Part 4

Mastana: Part 2

Part 1

Cure International Hospital

Mastana was nervous as she entered through the doors of the hospital. No one could see of course for she was wearing her finest blue burqa, but to her it was as if she were naked and the whole world could feel her misery and trepidation. For three whole days after her father’s announcement she had locked herself in her room and cried. She knew that she had no choice, that he had no choice in making her for what is one life compared to so many? Yes, another Ahmadzay girl could have been chosen, her cousin Farrukh for example who was quite the traditional, religious girl and would have been far more suited, but if the Ahmadzay’s had not sent their most prominent virgin then the other tribes and the king himself would have seen it as a slight on their honour and once an Afghan’s honour is questioned, then… No, she had to marry him, that she knew but it was so unfair, so very unfair. Why her? She had always loved studying and was so close to achieving her MBA and she had dreams, plans, to travel the world, to set up in business, to marry the man of her choice… Now instead she was to become a co-wife of a king and…

…and what…?

Preparations. All queens go through particular “preparations” to ensure that they remain equal in the eyes of their lord and the nation. Preparations to ensure they remain pious and submissive and modest like a good queen should be. Examples to the Nation.

But what are these “preparations”? And why would no one tell her? Two days ago she had been taken to the hospital and her entire body scanned and measured. Then… then that was it, back home as if nothing had happened.

What exactly was in store for her?

She looked through the dense grille of the burqa at the room before her. It was a standard hospital room with a bed and a bedside table. A nurse in green scrubs stood by the side, her face hidden by her niqaab. “You may remove your burqa now, Miss Ahmadzay,” she said. Mastana was glad to remove her burqa; she hated the thing. She had never worn a burqa except for special occasions and in India not even then. Ever since she had been announced as a fiancée of the king though, there had been a surge of interest in her and it was now mandatory whenever she left the house. She took it off and shook her long black hair out. The nurse gestured for her to sit on the bed and said, “Now Miss, I’m afraid my first task is to shave off that lovely hair of yours…”

“Shave my hair! But why?”

“It is necessary for the ‘preparations’ Miss, but I agree, it seems such a shame. Still, it can be made into a nice wig and sold to help the poor. Please Miss, sit there and I shall begin.”

Tears fell from Mastana’s eyes as her beautiful waist-length locks were cut off and fell to the floor, and they continued to flow as the nurse got out a razor and shaved her head completely bald. ‘Why? Why? Why?’ she thought to herself. ‘What man wants a wife with no hair?’ She tried asking the nurse of course, but she would say nothing beyond that it was all part of the “preparations”.

“Excellent Miss,” remarked the nurse when she had finished. “Now you just sit back in bed and I shall get you a cup of tea. That’ll make you feel better.”

And when she reappeared a minute later carrying a steaming hot cup of tea and Mastana sipped it, she did feel better. It was comforting and relaxing. She lay down in the bed. “Don’t worry my dear, don’t worry,” the nurse said, stroking her head. Mastana’s eyes felt heavy and she realised that it was the tea but by then the darkness was taking over.

When Mastana woke up, something wasn’t right. Her head felt heavy and her vision somehow different. She couldn’t figure out and the thinking hurt as the drugs were still in her system. Within seconds she drifted off again.

When she came to for the second time, her head was clearer and she was more aware. Nonetheless, things did not feel the same, something was not right, something had changed. Her vision. She could see alright, it wasn’t blurred like when she put on her burqa, but it was limited. All she could view was what was straight in front of her which was the white ceiling of the room. She turned her head and the window with bright light streaming in through came into view. Yet turning her head was somehow strange. She resumed her original position and the niqaab-covered face of the nurse came into view. “You have awoken, Miss, how good!” she exclaimed.

Mastana tried to reply but she couldn’t. Then she realised why: her mouth was full of something, something solid pushing against her cheeks. She lifted her hands to feel what it was but when they came to her face all she could hear was the clunk of plastic and those hands felt nothing! She tried to wiggle her fingers but she couldn’t move them! What was happening? She held them up before her eyes and was confronted by a rigid pair of black plastic hands! What on earth did it mean? She started to struggle and the nurse came over and stroked her head. She didn’t feel a thing but felt soothed. “Don’t worry Miss,” she said softly, “you’re fine. I know it’s a big change, all the wives struggle at first with their ‘preparations’ but you’ll get used to them. Everything is fine.”

Mastana stopped moving but then asked, “What have they done to me?” But of course, no sound came out. The nurse however, seemed to understand. “I’ll get the doctor,” she said. “She can explain everything.”

Dr. Rastagar was also wearing the green niqaab scrubs but her difference in rank was clear from the confidence with which she spoke. The words that came out however, were not ones that Mastana wanted to hear.

“Right Miss Ahmadzay, you have now undergone the first and most traumatic part of the preparations for becoming a Queen of Afghanistan, a great honour indeed although so sad to think of the tragedy of the late king. Now I need to explain to you what has been done and why. The first thing that you are probably worrying about is your head. It feels enclosed, am I right? And also you cannot speak? That is because it has been sealed into a rigid plastic hood. That is why you were shaved first and after you were knocked out, measures were taken to ensure that no hair ever grows back. The hood was made in two parts, cast specifically to match your facial contours which is why you were scanned earlier. The back was fitted first and then the front sealed onto it using heat sealing. As I said it is totally rigid and it is also permanent. The only openings are some small holes at your ears to facilitate hearing – although that will probably be much reduced – and of course the two pinholes over your eyes which you are now looking through and of course holes at the mouth and nose. I think it is of interest to you to explain just what has been done with both of those orifices. In your nose, tubes have been inserted for a centimetre or so and these have an air-filtering device which will prevent you breathing in germs and thus getting ill. As for the mouth, in your mouth was filled with a gel-like substance with a tube running through it. That solidified so that it now entirely fills your mouth but the tube allows for liquid intake and breathing. I am sorry to say that consuming solids will be impossible for you from now on, but you can still eat and drink with ease.”

Hearing all this made Mastana shudder and want to weep behind the black plastic of her hood. Why had this been done to her? One minute she was a promising MBA student and the next she wakes up in hospital, her head entombed within a prison of plastic!

“The reason that this has been done dates back to King Muhammad Nadir Khan. When he came to power he needed to ensure that not one tribe – and as such, not one wife – gained prominence over the others, otherwise the whole enterprise would fail. So what he did is have his wives wear leather masks, apparently inspired by Bedouin masks that he saw whilst in Oman, which obscured their features. This was an excellent solution except that before long the wives were taking them off, so he then had them modified to become full hoods which could be locked on. But even this was still not ideal as they had to be removed regularly to cut the queens’ hair and besides, as you will know well, much of the allure of a lady comes from other sources as well as her looks. When they spoke to him, he burned with longing and began to have his favourites, with some having sweeter voices and others more gravelly, some having a good way with words and others somewhat uncouth. So they were all gagged and that way he could love them all and treat them all equally, plus there was the added advantage of them not getting jealous of one another due to looks or getting into arguments over petty matters such as we women often do.”

“When King Muhammad Nadir Khan passed away and his son took over, he continued the practice and when his son, the late martyr King Mir Ahmad Khan ascended to the throne he not only held onto the tradition but had it enshrined in law and modified it. There were many problems associated with the leather hoods, the hair growth being one and skin complaints another and so he decided to employ modern technological means to improve matters. He contacted the Islamic Centre for Technology in Cairo for ideas and they provided the present-day solution. The plastic that your hood is made from is a revolutionary new material, lightweight yet extremely strong and, this is most important, your skin can breath through it. The permanent hair removal technique they also perfected and the result is ideal. Using the old leather hoods some features, a larger nose or the shapes of lips for example, could still be made out but with these hoods all four wives appear entirely identical. The fact is, your husband will not know which of you is which and so he will of course be treating all four tribes fairly.”

‘Astaghfirullah!’ thought Mastana, ‘I no longer exist, I am just a blank, anonymous wife!’

“The head casing is not all however, Miss Ahmadzay,” continued the doctor. “Whilst you were asleep similar casings were also placed around your hands which is why you cannot move your fingers at all. This has been done for a different reason than the hood. Whilst it must be admitted that some of the queens tried to remove their hoods before, impossible I may add with these new plastic models, your husband-to-be Muhammad Akbar Khan also insisted on the covering of the hands. Apparently he had a problem with his former wives in that, with them only enjoying congress with him every fourth night, they became very sexually frustrated and so used to commit grievous sin by fondling themselves. This is something that you will not be able to do now with your hands protected so. It is good that your future husband thinks of your honour so much.”

Strangely, Mastana did not feel grateful.

“And so that is what has happened to you. Today you may rest for an hour or so more and then we shall embark upon the second stage of the preparations. These are also an innovation of Muhammad Akbar Khan, and I think you shall prefer them to the first phase.”

And with those words she left and Mastana lay there trying to come to terms with it all.

Part 3

 

Mastana: Part 1

Mastana

Acknowledgements must go to the following individuals for their inspiration for this tale…

Allan Aldiss for his fantastic erotic harem novels

Valeriya Lukyanova, the living Barbie doll from Ukraine

2039

New Delhi, India

The moment that Mastana Ahmadzay realised that her life had changed irrevocably was the moment that she switched on her mobile after her Financial and Monetary Economics lecture. Although she generally kept her mobile on silent, it vibrating when someone was trying to contact her, for that lecture she always switched it off because without her full concentration, she always lost the thread of Prof. Singh’s arguments. However, when she switched it on that fateful Wednesday, she saw that she had ten missed calls and twenty-three texts. She opened the first. It read simply: Mastana, put on the news. That she did and with horror she saw the tragedy that had engulfed her homeland. The king had been assassinated and not just the king but all his family and all the leading figures in the country. The annual Loya Jirga had been targeted by the Taliban and they had been more successful than they could ever have hoped. Her Uncle Saeedullah, the head of the powerful Ahmadzay clan had been amongst them. Immediately she typed in the website of Ariana Afghan Airlines and booked herself on that evening’s flight to Kabul. Islamic funerals after all, have to take place within twenty-four hours of the death.

Kabul, Afghanistan

The Ahmadzay Family Home

Immediately after the funeral, they returned home her father took her to one side. “Mastana my darling, we need to talk,” he said. She nodded and they went into his study. Once inside she sat down and he began to speak.

“As you know my daughter, our beloved country of Afghanistan used to be one of the most wretched on earth. We had decades of war, first with the Soviets, then with the Taliban, then with the Americans. They thought Karzai was the solution but no man chosen by foreigners could ever have united the Afghans. We needed to choose our own and so we did, King Muhammad Nadir Khan, and an inspired choice it was. He gave us twelve years of precious peace before his son took over and granted us eight more before his son ascended to the throne three years ago, but as we know only too well, King Mir Ahmad Khan was treacherously murdered yesterday.”

There was a moment of silence as the tragedy was recalled yet again.

“But we Afghans will not permit a return to the old ways of hate and slaughter. A new king has already been chosen for Allah has blessed us by causing our late monarch’s young brother to have been absent from the Loya Jirga yesterday. Muhammad Akbar Khan was praying at the shrine of Khwaja Abu Nasr Parsa. His faith saved him.”

“Subhan’allah!”

“Subhan’allah indeed, my daughter, subhan’allah indeed! Afghanistan has a future again, those perverters of His Divine Will shall not succeed. But as you know, having a king alone is not enough. King Muhammad Nadir Khan only managed to bring about peace because he united the tribes and he did that by honouring them all. On the day of his coronation he divorced his previous wives and married the most prominent virgins from the Durrani, Barakzai, Hotaki and Ahmadzay families. We all remember the great honour bestowed upon your cousin Huma when she was married to King Mir Ahmad Khan on the day of his coronation. By uniting the families and giving all equal honour, then the peace, stability and happiness of Afghanistan is guaranteed.”

“I know all this father well, so why are you telling it to me again?”

“Because my darling daughter, you now have a role to fulfil. With the death of your uncle and cousin, I am now the most prominent Ahmadzay in the land and as such, you are the most prominent eligible virgin for the role of queen…

“What?! You mean for me to marry Muhammad Akbar Khan! But what about my MBA, I have only a year left and then I planned…”

“I know, I know, my darling, and I am sorry, for we always intended you to become educated, work in the West or India or China perhaps and to choose your own spouse, but this is a great honour, to wed a king and…”

“As his third or fourth wife!”

“No Mastana, you know the rules; all wives are equal under Afghani Law. Instead of numbers they may retain their names and…”

“But Muhammad Akbar Khan is so religious and I am not. We are not suited!”

“It is not about being suited personally, it is about you suiting your country! Do you wish a return to war and strife? Do you wish to have the blood of thousands on your hands Mastana?”

“No father but…”

“But nothing, this is politics my darling. The coronation is scheduled for two weeks today and thus that is when you shall be married as well. But before then there is much to do. The queens of Afghanistan have to be specially prepared for their role you know.”

Part 2